Advice

Open Cuffing Season

Social media distorting our social nature?

Open Cuffing Seasonphoto by : Karla Renic
written by Hannah Bing
November 25, 2018 7:48 pm

Winter months bring the holidays. The air gets colder and the snow in Halifax will start to fall. It’s also cuffing season.  

Cuffing season is a time of year where people often find themselves wishing to be in a committed relationship. But why?  

study done by the dating app Hinge found that men are 15 per cent more likely to look for a relationship in winter months compared to the annual average, and 11 per cent less likely to look for one in the spring and summer months. Women are five per cent more likely to look for a relationship during the winter months and five percent less likely in spring and summer.  

 

Do we seek comfort in the cold winter months?  

It becomes dark at 5 p.m. The light of day is shorter than the rest of the year. The increased darkness causes our brain to produce more melatonin and less serotonin. Melatonin makes your body feel sleepy, while serotonin is responsible for mood regulation. The imbalance of these bodily chemicals may cause sadness, sleepiness and irritability. Perhaps we need a safety blanket in times where the darkness makes days harder than usual. 

We seek attention from a significant other and not from our friends.  

Friends do indeed provide companionship and can often accompany us just like a significant other can. Friendships can be longer lasting than romantic relationships. Why do we crave a relationship more in the Winter than in any other season?  

Perhaps it may be a different comfort, one less for ourselves and more for others. Scrolling through Instagram may feel a little lonely when you double tap pictures of the couples Halloween costumes, kissing under the mistletoe, cuddled up to the backdrop of snowy weather, their coveted New Years’ Eve kiss as the clock strikes midnight, and finally Valentine’s Day dinners.  

It’s no wonder so many crave the intimate, inseparable “cuffed” relationship that thrives during this time of year. 

So much of our lives revolve heavily around social media. This is how many see the world. We know what people are doing on their Instagram or Facebook. Relationship gossip has always existed but it didn’t include scrolling through picture upon picture of couples. Our obsession with couples’ activities reflects that we don’t know how alone we feel until we see others and realize we also want that.  

Maybe we want to participate in a couple’s costume to post on Instagram or Facebook, to show the world ‘Look at me, I’m happy,’ and I’m happy because I have a person, someone who I have made a part of myself and vice versa.  

It’s human nature to need someone, we thrive off each other. 

Maybe friendships aren’t enough? We want more. We want the commitment, the domestication, the intimacy. Romantic relationships are set apart from friendships because we don’t generally have only one friend. Our friends have other friends, but our significant other is ours, they are our person. Our person we can count on to be the second half of our costume, to be under the mistletoe, our New Years’ Eve kiss, our valentine.  

We are only human. Of course it’s nice to have a person who’s committed to you, and to feel no lonely fear when looking at your phone and seeing “couples” things. We want people to see us happy, excited, engaged. People do we tend to find happiness in others. Whether this is healthy or not, it’s in our nature. We are dependent creatures. We should find happiness in ourselves, but it’s okay to find some in others too.  

Maybe cuffing season ain’t so bad.  

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