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Not every romance is a rom-com

This story contains mentions of domestic violence.

The controversy surrounding Colleen Hoover’s novel It Ends With Us (2016) is nothing new. Since its release in 2016, the novel has been subject to criticism for its glamourization of domestic violence and subsequent marketing. The novel’s recently released film adaptation, starring Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni, is now facing a similar round of criticism.

It Ends With Us (2024) follows Lily Blossom Bloom (Blake Lively) as she falls in love with Ryle (Justin Baldoni). Ryle begins to abuse Lily, and when Lily’s first love, Atlas, reappears in her life, Ryle’s abuse worsens. When she leaves him, she discovers that she is pregnant with his child.  

This might not be the synopsis you would expect if all you saw was Blake Lively’s portion of the press tour.  

Two-sided marketing

Last summer, the releases of Barbie (2023) and Oppenheimer (2023) on the same day resulted in the cultural phenomenon known as “Barbenheimer,” as the two movies dominated the box office. Many fans of Barbie wore pink to theatres, others wore suits or formal attire to watch Oppenheimer.   

In a similar fashion, Blake Lively encouraged fans to bring friends and wear florals to see It Ends With Us in theatres. Many online have suggested that she was trying to capture the same attention and create the same buzz for the film as was captured for the two films the summer prior.  

Lively is married to Ryan Reynolds, who was promoting his new movie, Deadpool and Wolverine (2024), around the same time. Reynolds and his co-star, Hugh Jackman, have approached their press outings with the silliness that the promotion of an action/comedy movie allows. Lively has seemingly approached her press tour for It Ends With Us with a similar energy. The difference is that Lively is not promoting a comedy.  

There appears to be a significant difference of approach between the marketing of the movie done by Lively in comparison to that of co-star and film director Baldoni. They have made almost no joint appearances during the promotions and speculation about their on-set drama has only intensified. Neither has directly responded to these allegations.  

Baldoni has used many of his several press stops to highlight the seriousness of and raise awareness for domestic violence.  

“If anybody has had that real life experience, I can imagine how hard it would be to imagine their experience being in a romance novel,” Baldoni said in an interview with Associated Press. He also spoke about how difficult it was to play such a character as a father of two daughters. He has long been an advocate against toxic masculinity.  

Lively has been criticized for her upbeat marketing of the film and for using press appearances to promote her new haircare brand. This once again brings us back to the root of the problem: this is not an upbeat movie.  

Portraying domestic violence in film

If you only watched the first hour of the movie, you might actually think the film is a romantic comedy. Ryle is portrayed in a similar manner to a romance protagonist. He tells Lily that all he wants in life is to protect her. This doesn’t prevent the abuse that follows. This is how the cycle of abuse typically begins.  

Domestic violence continues to permeate our culture. It is not straightforward, and it usually begins in insidious ways. 

It Ends With Us tells a story of domestic violence, but has drawn criticism for its glamourization of the subject along with its subsequent marketing. (Image credit: Unsplash)

Not every romance is a rom-com

Promoting a movie about domestic violence as a romantic comedy sends the wrong message. Romantic comedies deal with love in funny, lighthearted ways that can in no way describe this movie. 

Not every movie that has a romantic plot is meant to be a romantic comedy.  

How you market a movie about domestic violence matters. By marketing this movie as a romantic comedy, the premise is betrayed. By the end of the movie, Lily realizes that she has been abused and cannot stay with Ryle. She is determined to end the cycle of abuse with her and her daughter. The point of the film is that violence is not love. There is no final act of reconciliation.  

Audiences deserve to know what they’re walking into with this film. Domestic violence is an important issue that warrants serious, meaningful discussions, but people should not walk into the theatres for this film dressed in florals, prepared to see a romantic comedy. 

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