Pro-life deal breaker

Relationships are more interesting when you don’t agree about everything. Opposites attract.  

Arguments over what shows to watch, or what to make for dinner can be adorable and fun. Arguments about a women’s right to choose and the “sanctity of life” are not adorable and fun. 

Being pro-life needs to be a definite red flag for all heterosexual women. Not the type of red flag that’s a little sexy and mysterious. The type of red flag that makes you leave immediately and punch said male in the face if he ever tries to talk to you again. 

Meet Tinder match, potential mate and pro-life male Donald.  

When Donald says “I am pro-life,” what he’s really saying is “I don’t believe in women’s agency – or science,” which – yikes!  

Donald may try to convince you otherwise.  

“Science confirms that a zygote – the fertilized ovum when still only a single cell, is fully and completely human,” he says.  

You consider this for a single millisecond before laughing at Donald for trying to claim that a single-celled zygote is the same thing as a living breathing human. 

But if that isn’t enough, let’s give Donald the benefit of the doubt and consider a future together. 

Scenario One: A one-night stand with Donald leads to accidental pregnancy. After letting him know the plan to abort, he expresses his discontent and calls you a murderer. You delete his number from your phone and are grateful that this match made in hell never went anywhere. 

Scenario Two: Long-term relationship with Donald leads to accidental pregnancy. Forcing you into the unfair position of either having a baby and staying with the man who gives zero shits about your right to choose. Or ending a relationship which at this point, would mean a decent chunk of life wasted. Either way, it’s a tumultuous, exhausting affair. 

Scenario Three: Long-term relationship with Donald leads to a wonderful daughter. She has an accidental pregnancy. He tells her that she either has the baby, or is a horrible, unforgivable human. This is all very hard on you. But most importantly, this is very hard on her. 

You confront Donald about his view, but “It’s just my personal opinion,” Donald deflects, in a classic attempt to cover-up that he is out of defensible justifications.  

No. When his opinion has strongly oppressive effects, it being a ‘personal opinion’ isn’t enough. If it was up to him, abortion isn’t a choice he would allow you, your future daughter or any other woman in his life to make. 

The pro-life movement isn’t doing anyone any favours. Who are they fighting for?  

They aren’t fighting for women. What kind of women’s rights doesn’t allow her the fundamental right to her own body? Pregnancy affects women’s bodies, and probably the rest of their lives. Women’s right to decide in a matter as all-encompassing as pregnancy isn’t radical. 

Maybe they are fighting for fetuses. Fetuses. Not babies. What about in-vitro fertilization which occurs in a lab? Technicians fertilize multiple eggs and pick the healthiest one to implant in the mother. Is in-vitro also immoral? Apparently “one of the most troublesome aspects of IVF is the destruction or neglect of embryos.” A cluster of cells is about as human as a multicellular bacteria.  

Why should a cluster of cells have such a strong protections on account of being “human” when many adult humans don’t receive this same priority? How can pro-lifers advocate for a society that viciously protects the fetus’ right to life, as this same society actively violates the right to life of others? African Americans, Indigenous and LGTBQ+ people for example. Where is the outrage, the “sanctity of life,” when it comes to them? 

The pro-life movement isn’t about helping women or fetuses. So what is it? 

Best guess, it’s men desperately holding on to anything they have left in their rapidly depleting grasp on women’s agency.