Arts & Culture

Battle of the nogs

The Gazette staff sampled seven egg nogs so you don’t have to

Battle of the nogsphoto by : Kaila Jefferd-Moore
These are the various nogs the Gazette staff subjected themselves to.
written by Rebecca Dingwell
December 7, 2018 2:05 pm

Editor’s note: This piece was inspired by The Coast’s nog taste test from 2017. 

It’s that time of year again – egg nog hit grocery store shelves around Thanksgiving and we must soak up all the noggy days we have left before the government takes it away again. 

News editor Rebecca Dingwell, arts editor Jessica Briand, opinions editor Lexi Kuo, copy editor Matt Stickland, visuals editor Chris Stoodley and editor-in-chief Kaila Jefferd-Moore loaded up on locally-available nog to determine which is the best.  

Stickland and Briand are both lactose intolerant, so Briand stuck with the dairy-free variety while Stickland decided to tempt fate and try them all.  

“As someone who’s never really had egg nog ever, here I am to be the impartial judge,” said Kuo. 

Dairy-free nog 

Kaila Jefferd-Moore: We’re going to start with the lactose and dairy-free ones.
Matt Stickland: AKA the bad ones.
KJM: That’s not true. That’s rude.
Rebecca Dingwell: Hmm, it’s kind of true. 

  1. So Delicious coconut nog

Jessica Briand: I hate coconut and people try to do coconut products in place of dairy products all the time. It’s like, my biggest pet peeve.
RD: That’s not bad, actually.
MS: That actually tastes pretty good.
Chris Stoodley: I’m surprised.
JB: Aruuugh.
RD: There’s a bit of an aftertaste that I’m not crazy about.
JB: I liked it until I got the coconut aftertaste. 

  1. Califia Farms almond nog

KJM: It smells really bad.
CS: It smells like hair product.
RD: No, no. No thank you, Califia Farms.
JB: It’s literally like walking into Bath and Body Works with your mouth wide open. 

  1. Earth’s Own almond nog

JB: It smells better. It doesn’t smell so artificial.
RD: It doesn’t taste like egg nog, but it’s not a bad almond beverage.
KJM: I really enjoy it.
LK: This just tastes like sweet almond milk. 

Light nog 

KJM: Should we do light first or regular first?
RD: Let’s do light first, because I feel like that will leave less of a residue in your mouth. 

  1. Baxter light egg nog

    MS: The Belgian lace is not so great.
    LK: I’m not a fan.
    KJM: It tastes like melted-down vanilla ice cream.
    LK: I was gonna say that.
    RD: But less good.  

  1. Farmers light egg nog

    RD: It’s like frothy, see, look at the bubbles.
    KJM: The Farmers one is like, heavy to pick up.
    LK: *disappointed sigh*
    RD: I can taste some spice, but can’t really taste the nog so much.
    CS: This was the only spiced one.
    KJM: That’s what the Baxter’s egg nog was missing – the spice. 

Classic egg nog 

KJM: Let’s move on to the full-bodied egg nog.
MS: I will not need lunch.  

  1. Scotsburn holiday nog

KJM: I like this one.
RD: I think this is my favourite so far.
MS: It’s all right.
RD: I wouldn’t mind putting like, a pinch of nutmeg in it.
CS: I love that.
LK: I’m actually – this is not one of my favourites so far, no. I think I prefer more spiced. 

  1. Farmers egg nog

RD: This is the nog that I grew up on and I have to say now that I’ve tasted all the other nogs…I get a little bit of nostalgia, but otherwise, this isn’t it for me. I think going forward in my adult life, if I were to purchase a nog it would be the Scotsburn over the Farmers.
CS: I agree 100 per cent.
MS: *burps loudly*
LK: I like the Farmers better, actually.
KJM: Definitely Farmers. 

Conclusion

The Farmers classic nog was most-loved, with Scotsburn a close second. Califia Farms almond nog was the most-hated (and most expensive).  

Nog newbie Lexi Kuo said: “This whole thing is just –  when you go and buy nog, you’re getting a completely different drink. How are you supposed to know what is the ideal nog?” 

What’s your ideal nog? Let us know on Twitter @DalGazette.

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