Sexability: Just say yes….really, it’s okay

It always strikes me as odd when I realize we always tell women it’s okay to say no to sex, but very rarely do we say it’s okay to say yes.

Don’t get me wrong: anybody has the right say no anytime – I’m not debating that. In my view, consent is the most important thing when it comes to sex.

But when did we decide to shame people – women in particular – for saying yes? When did it become okay to judge people for what they do with their own bodies?

I bring this up because I had an experience with this particular brand of slut-shaming last week when somebody I knew said that if I didn’t give it away so easy, I wouldn’t get dumped is much. Don’t worry, I wasn’t friends with this person (this break-up was nobody’s fault, and her statement was not only hurtful and inappropriate but also made no sense).

How is a decision which two adults make about what to do with their bodies inherently somehow wrong? And why on Earth is it a reflection on my character?

Saying yes to sex regardless of gender or sexual orientation has nothing to do with your self-worth nor should other people judge you for things that don’t concern them.

What infuriated me the most was that the person who shared their opinion was a female. Don’t we have enough obstacles to overcome in terms of sexual operation without turning on each other? What happened to The Sisterhood that I hear preached about? Can we get that back, please?